* Temporary Assigned Duty
Danielle called last night, and the homesickness had finally gotten to her. For the first time since her shore tour began almost 3 years ago, she’s on TAD 8 hours away, training for her next assignment.
This is also the first time since our son was born 17 months ago that she’s been away from Sean for more than a few hours. I think that’s probably the hardest part. We know what it’s like to be separated from each other, but not getting to see her little boy is an altogether different emotional experience.
So when she called last night, we decided it was time to experiment with Skype, a program that allows you to make phone calls (and, more importantly video calls) over the Internet. For free.
Before we left, we installed the free Skype software on her laptop, which has a built-in webcam. I bought a camera for our home computer and installed the same software, and we had everything we needed to get started.
I was amazed at how easy it was to get it up and running. I added Danielle as a contact and seconds later got a pop-up saying I had received a video call from her. With one click, I was looking at her face on my computer screen in real time and hearing her voice over the speakers and she was looking at and hearing me.
It instantly lifted our spirits. Sean was already in bed so we made a plan to make another call this afternoon.
That would be the real test. How would our toddler react to seeing his mom on the computer? He had obviously noticed her absence—he’s been unusually clingy—and I wondered if he would like seeing his mom via video or if he would get upset.
The results were mixed. Sean didn’t really seem to understand that he could interact with Danielle, but he also seemed to like seeing her face and hearing her voice. The hardest part was getting him to sit still and stay within the viewing angle of the camera.
All-in-all, I’d say it was a success. Danielle got to see our little one’s smile, and he got to see hers. With a little coaxing, I even got him to say “Bye-bye,” before she had to sign off and head back to the classroom to study.
With a little practice, I think Skype will be a great tool to help us get through this separation. For tomorrow’s call, I’m going to reposition the speakers so it sounds more like her voice is coming from her face on the monitor. Maybe that will make it a little more life-like.
Technology will never fully replace face-to-face human interaction, but maybe it’s the next best thing.
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Just keep it up, he’ll get the idea with time and practice. We’ve been using video chat to have Theo talk to my parents and my sister practically since he was born. Even when we haven’t gotten together for several months, he always remembers and wants to see Grandma, Grandpa and Aunt Dee Dee.
Even when he loses interest and wanders off (Theo was the same at that age), keep talking among the two of you — I think that helps get the idea that it’s a conversation with Mommy, not just looking at pictures.
When my wife was at sea last year, Theo was about the same age — I always had him “Say night night to mommy” at bedtime (with blowing kisses etc), kept pictures of mommy in every room for us to spend time with daily, and had videos of mommy talking to “him” (actually just the camera) saved on the computer.
When my wife came home, he recognized her the moment she took off her cover and he was as excited as I’ve ever seen him. With nothing to compare with, I have to figure this is a pretty easy age to have the separation.
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[...] Danielle left she got a fancy new laptop with a webcam built in, so we’ve been experimenting with Skype. I think with some tinkering it will help with Sean’s separation anxiety and Danielle’s [...]