This is the official blog of MilSpouse.com and Military Spouse Magazine. Here you will find bloggers such as Military Spouse Magazine editor Babette Maxwell as well as author Sarah Smiley and the “Military Spouse Coach” Krista Wells. Stay tuned for news and opinion regarding important events and issues in the military spouse community.
-
Recent Comments
Military College on About Sandy Welker on Spongebob Arnel on Spouse scholarship to work wit… military spouse on About hansa ashraf on Win a free home makeover for t… -
-
17 Comments
Twas the night before Christmaas and all through the house everyone was sleeping except…..The one person who forgot to buy presents for their loved ones. Where could she/he be at this time of night. Everything is closed except for one place….Oh!!!My Mary Kay consultant!!!
Anyone ever heard of AHRN.com? It’s a free DoD sponsored website to help military find housing in the U.S. Tell me about your experience. We are PCSing to Fort Lee in May. Help!
Warmest Greetings to all of you. I am not a military spouse. I am a licensed psychologist and full time faculty in counseling psychology at Troy University in Tampa. At the present time, I am conducting a study, “The Psychological Effects of Combat on Families and Loved Ones”. I pray that you will not be offended by my posting on your blog, but I am looking for family members of our troops to complete a brief, anonymous survey dealing the effects of combat.
The genesis of this study came from a spouse who sought therapy with me in Tampa. She found me through the Tricare network and, when she came in, she was extremely distraught. Her spouse had been home from Iraq for 6 months following a 16 month deployment. She stated that, after he was home for about three months, she began experiencing increasing anxiety, sleep disturbance, tension and an intense fear that her husband would die that day- that once he left the house in the morning, that she would not see him alive again. During his deployment, she stated that she was worried about his safety, yet felt a great deal of support from other spouses in the same situation. She was excited to see him come home relatively unscathed by the experience and looked forward to a “normal” life together. What she began experiencing at three months caught her completely off guard. Her family members told her that she should not be feeling this- that her husband was home safely. For the next three months, she did not discuss this with her friends or family and her symptoms greatly intensified. She believed that she was losing her mind and was greatly relived when, after evaluation, informed her that, while this might seem unexpected, she was exhibiting the symptoms of someone who has been traumatized, i.e. ptsd. We worked together for about the next nine months and she has since completed therapy- at least this phase. We are still unsure of the relapse rates; however, she has been symptom-free for about the past five months.
Another spouse with similar anxiety-related issues, while not as severe or debilitating, also presented for therapy and this provoked my question of “How common is ptsd in spouses and families of our soldiers serving in harms way. The survey that I designed is an initial attempt to identify the scope of the issue. To date, spouses are the only family members responding to the survey. A second stage of this study will focus specifically on children.
This is a legitimate, academic study, authorized and approved by the Institutional Review Board of Troy University (formerly Troy State) and any assistance is greatly appreciated. You can copy and paste this web address directly into your browser and you will arrive at the first page of the survey. I am happy to respond to any questions via email. Thank you so much for your time and support.
peace
mfs
http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=RwZvHVsjXiJQmOIIjPPWoA_3d_3d
Michael,
Hi there and welcome to our site. If you would, please send a copy of your survey to Ryan at ryan@milspouse.com. He’s our web director and while I appreciate your efforts, all postingd of this nature must go through a clearing process. It is up to the spouses to participate if they want-we trust them, they are adults and capable of making their own choices–but I must insist you contact Ryan beforehand.
Thank you for understanding but we must have a checks and balances measure to protect the spouses who frequent here. I’m sure you understand.
Kara,
I’m also a recently diagnosed Bipolar. It just so happens that I was diagnosed less than a month before my husband left for OCS for the Navy. If you find out anything, please let me know. I must admit that I’m scared to deal with the military now that I’ve been diagnosed, but I guess that’s how things are going now. I hope things are going alright for you. Thanks.
Hi, Army wife recently diagonsed with bipolar disorder new to milspouse. Yes, that’s right, I’m bipolar. I’m still learning about this illness. I would like to know if anyone out there knows about bipolar or has a relative living with it. I have been doing my research on the internet and reading all the inofrmation I can get my hands on. I’ve been fighting with depression for some quite time but knew it was more than that. I talk to my family doctor and told him, I don’t feel right. I think its more than just depression. I feel like I need to be check for bipolar disorder.” I know this illness runs on my birth father side. Bingo, I’m right. Thanks for listening.
Hello,
I’m Marine vet and now working with a production team producing an innovative new (non-profit) web series called In Their Boots. Our content takes a humanistic non partisan look at the affects our nation’s operations in Iraq and Afghanistan are having on vets, their families and communities across America. Our stories stress optimism, and the devotion of the people and organizations that help our characters on their journey. I know our content will be of interest to your audience.
I hope you’ll take the time to visit our site and come to know our mission and the layout of our program. I’m curious if there is a more open channel where I could post links to some of our content for your audience.
intheirboots.com
Thanks for your time,
Jan M Bender
Vet/Intern/Consultant
In Their Boots
This is my first blog, it is a comment about an article in April Military Spouse, Feeling Good, Looking Good. I don’t understand the point. I am 30, am I supposed to feel old now? I have been married four years, my husband is a Navy Pilot, we met when I was 25 he was 27. I don’t wish to be 22 any day. When I was 22 I was struggling through college, had 3 roommates and a stupid boyfriend who couldn’t decide on a major or which beer party to go to. Now, I own a home, have a job, nice clothes my life is so much better, I am so excited for my 30’s and we are planning to have a baby soon too.
I know and worked with women from all over the world and most say Americans are obsessed with age and we also don’t know how to dress or age well. We American women should listen to that. I wish women would stop saying how old they are how much their kids bring them down. We should embrace any age and look beautiful all the time.
Thanks
Debra
Hello,
I have been a Navy spouse 16 years+. Another PCS is upon us and I have to quit my management job at Fleet and Family Support Center in San Diego and as Military.com’s West Coast Ambassador. I’ll follow my Chief wherever he’s sent, but it’s tough to give up the good job I worked so hard to get. Fleet and Family would hire me in Millington, TN if they had an opening, but at this time they don’t. So once again I’m busy sending out my resume. July 3rd is my last day. Then its off to Tenn. and the unknown job market.
AHRN is a great website. we refer folks there every day at the Navy Family Service Center. Use it if you can. There is also Militarybyowner.com that is great. Hope this helps.
Dayle – Funny you should leave this comment. I am in Millington and they recently had something come open you might be interested in. You can email me at wendy(at)navywiferadio.com if you like. Good Luck!
Dear Military Spouse,
The Title of your magazine is “Military Spouse”, but it caters almost solely to the female gender. I am a woman, and I am a member of the Army National Guard serving my country proudly. We are a dual military couple and my husband has had to face many of the situations and issues that your readers have. The only difference is that he is a man. When he picked up the February 2009 issue of Military Spouse he was shocked to find that almost everything was geared towards the female spouse, and that “Mr. Mom” was the only segment for men like him. However, the title “Mr. Mom” was insulting. “How is he a Mr. Mom? He’s a father, a military spouse, a man supporting his wife. How does that make him Mr. Mom?” he questioned.
For decades women have fought for the rights to serve their country as proud soldiers, and it is our opinion that gearing your magazine solely towards female spouses is degrading to those men who support their wives in this endeavor. The true intention of the Military Spouse magazine is revealed in co-founder Babette Maxwell’s article entitled Change the World, Burn the Thong in which she spouts feminist language and states that “ How about a man should entertain us every once in while, or better yet, half the time?” I have news for Babbette Maxwell, and that is that many men just like my husband have entertained their wives with the ultimate spousal sacrifice and statements like hers have no place in a military spouse magazine. I understand that statistically there may be more female military spouses then men, but having the co-founder speak about female rights and entitling your one and only article dedicated to male spouses “Mr. Mom” puts the icing on the cake. What a title for a man who has sacrificed so much for his wife to have the freedom of fighting for and defending this wonder country. It is apparent from both of these articles and the outline of the magazine as a whole that this is a women’s publication, so why not call it like it is. Male spouses need just as much support during deployments and being handed the Military Spouse magazine by the family readiness coordinator makes them feel as though their sacrifice is overshadowed by an underlying, overpowering feminist movement.
Jenna, I wholeheartedly agree with your comments. Yesterday I picked up a copy of Military Spouse Magazine while waiting for an appointment. I could not believe what I was reading, I thought I was thrown back to the day before women had rights. A purely sexist magazine. I am an active duty female and my civilian husband fully supports me and the military. I am terribly disappointed at the impression this magazine may have on young women. We should empower young women of today. I also find the term “Mr. Mom” offensive, let’s make sure moms are named “Mr. Dad.” I’m sure this is falling on deaf ears since co-founder is from the dark ages. Male spouses need support too and magazines need to empower not disempower readers into this false sense of dependency on a man.
I was quoted in the article Jenna is referring to, and aside from the title I thought it was well written (yes, I’m biased). But I, too, was irritated by the title. Mr. Mom? That is so very 1980s Michael Keaton having a hard time with a vacuum cleaner. I guess my only real comment is that after a title like “Mr. Mom” I can’t wait to see an article about working women given the title “Mrs. Dad” by your editors.
I’ve always enjoyed staying here to get the most updated news about military spouses. Great site.
This blog is really good for military spouses to get the most useful information what they need to know.
One Trackback
[...] I felt the need to respond to this comment that appeared on the milspouse.com blog. Here’s a sample: When [my husband] picked up the [...]